Tuesday, January 26, 2016

3D T-shirts

Who the hell decided that THIS was a good idea? 3D T-shirts are an interesting innovation, but so far I haven't seen one that I would want to wear or one that doesn't creep my shit out. I've seen some with exposed breasts, but I'm sure its only a matter of time before naked torsos are the most popular 3D T-shirts with huge 3D breasts sticking out at you and amazing 3D six packs. But for now we have creepy skinless cats staring at us with an expression that seems to say, "How the hell did I get on this fucking T-shirt?"

Friday, January 22, 2016

Kim Jones was right about something.

Kim Jones, the Kentucky clerk who refused to issue marriage licenses to same sex couple (and as a result defied the law) because it was against her religious beliefs attended President Obama’s last State of the Union Address. It was a curious thing to see her there. Afterwards, it was discovered that an Ohio congressman invited her without realizing that he invited her.

I’m sure the staff member who works for the congressman invited Ms. Jones as a way to remind Obama and a majority of the Supreme Court how much the country hates them for supporting equal rights to all citizens no matter what their sexual orientation when every Christian knows that gay people aren’t REAL people.

Considering all the snide ways the Republicans have shown contempt for the president (and by extension the majority of the country that elected him twice), inviting Ms. Jones was hardly a surprise. In essence, they’re saying this is what a real patriot looks like- someone who prays and votes with the righteous white people to whom God gave this wonderful country to and is willing to defy any law they don’t like.

What surprised me is that Ms. Jones accepted the invitation. My guess is she too thought she was sticking it to the president with her presence, but probably after a few minutes into address, she realized what a mistake she’d made. She had to sit through President Obama’s entire State of the Union address where he basically gets to tell everybody what he thinks of them and how he feels things should work in this country. If you truly hate Obama, why subject yourself to that kind of torture if you’re not required to be there?

During the speech, the camera occasionally landed on her and each time she looked like she was suffering from a terrible indigestion. Some people made fun of what she wore, but I think that’s a cheap shot. Other than the Supreme Court justices and the Joint Chief of Staff, I don’t think there was a dress code.

After the speech, news reporters stuck their microphones into her face and asked her for her reaction to Obama’s State of the Union address. The reporters dramatically pointed out that she spoke only four words and they were not “I love big butts.” What she said was “It was a speech.”

“It was a speech.”

What no one has mentioned is that she was indeed correct. The State of the Union address is essentially a speech. By definition, if you make a speech or give a talk, you speak for a period of time to an audience, usually saying things which you have prepared in advance.

She might have said, “It was a duck.” That would have been wrong. There was no water fowl present. She could have said, “It was a poop.” That could be construed as criticism or another failed attempt to define what she witnessed during the President’s speech. Or what she left in her seat. This is just conjecture since she didn’t actually say it was a poop.

The point is, what Ms. Jones said was correct and though I might not agree with any other collection of words she has uttered, I have to agree with her on these four words. It was a speech. It was damn fine speech from a great president.