I'm hoping this will be the first in a series of moments in life when I thought, "are you kidding me?"
I was in a car accident. I was waiting at a red light when a woman turned onto the lane next to me, hit a patch of ice, and since she was speeding, lost control of her car, and slammed into the front of mine. She got a ticket and my car was hauled off to the repair shop, where it say for weeks. The reason my car sat for so long was because the woman's insurance agency kept putting off sending an adjuster over to the repair shop to write up an estimate of the damages. The insurance company even had the nerve to give me shit for using the rental car they provided for such a long ass time when they were causing the delay.
Finally, the insurance company sent out an adjuster and my car was repaired. However, when I got the car back, it kept dying on me. What I didn't know was that leaving my car inactive for such a long period of time caused the battery to die. I took the car back to the dealer that repaired my car and demanded they tell me what was wrong with it. The service department rep had me pop the hood to have a look see. I did and we saw battery acid spewing out of the battery along with reams of smoke.
The rep turned to me and with a straight face said, "I think it's your battery."
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
After we determined that I desperately needed a new battery, the rep told me to drive my car to the service garage.
Again, ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
The service rep and I pushed my car to the garage and they put in a new battery at no charge, so I guess you can say this story had a happy ending.