I was driving home today, the weather was great, and while waiting for a light, I noticed the following bumper sticker on the car in front of me:
My Dog Is Smarter Than Your Honor Roll Student.
No way! Without opposable thumbs and human speech, there is no chance a dog, no matter how intelligent, could outperform an honor roll student. But of course, the bumper sticker was less about sticking to the facts than being thought provoking. And it inspired me to come up with some new bumper sticker ideas.
MY DOG IS NOT SMARTER THAN YOUR HONOR ROLL STUDENT,
BUT HE'LL NEVER BREAK MY HEART BY RUNNING OFF WITH SOME TRAMP.
SENTIENT BEING ON BOARD
THIS CAR IS SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN OF ALL AGES
IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE DRIVING TO SCHOOL?
DOES YOUR MOTHER KNOW YOU DRIVE WITH THAT MOUTH?
UNLESS YOU'RE TALKING TO JESUS,
HANG UP AND DRIVE.
I DIDN'T USE MY TURN SIGNAL BECAUSE
I WAS TOO BUSY TEXTING MY BFF THAT
I WAS CHANGING LANES.
TAILGATING IS NOT A SEXUAL POSITION.